Well, it started out sorta fuzzy, but I remember walking off this train platform and having to walk over a scafolding as a train slowly chugged by behind me. Jen was there too, but she didn't have enough strength to hold on or something, so she held on to me and we walked across this scafolding, and down it, and were caught by this lady police officer, saying we can't do that anymore and had to promise her not to.
So then, aparently we were going to a party in this big sorta ... modern sports bar/someone's house, because there was a big open area for drinking, but then home-like rooms where people were making out and having sex. There were a ton of people from my highschool, and quite frankly it terrified me. Well, Jen dissapeared into the crowds, and I was left alone. I went to go get some food and stuff, and I had to show my school id. The bouncer guy looked at my id, then at me, then at my id and told me I needed to get a different one that looked more like me, one with a finger print of mine stamped on it, and took my id because he thought it was faked. I threw a temper tantrum, and somehow managed to blow up the fat man's head. I walked off, and into the more homey looking parts of the place. I walked into a room where there were 3 girls and one man in a bed. 2 girls were going at it, the man was laying down, doing nothing, while the other girl, naked beside him, started to pet his chest.
Then I realized, it was Severus O_o. I suddenly yelled at the girls to get out of the bed, and Severus looked at me as if he knew me (for some reason, whenever I dream of Alan Rickman, he's always Snape, never the Metatron or Alexander Dane ... and always seems to recognize me) getting out of the bed and standing in a dark corner. The girls left and I watched Severus quietly. I knew he didn't like women, and he was feeling uncomfortable. I closed the door to the room and locked it,and he looked up at me, narrowing his eyes. I slipped onto the bed and opened up my arms. He came willingly to me and sliped into the bed beside me, and into my arms. That was my wish. Just to have someone to hold, to sleep with at night, someone like Sev to be with me.
But when is that ever going to happen?
I want to have that dream again ... I remember,one day I was watching Beakman's World at my grandma's house. It was one of those Saturday visits that I always did, being the perfect little grandchild and whatnot. I remember watching this episode where Beakman was talking about dreams. And then he said something to the effect of "Want to know how to control what you dream? Don't change the channel!" blah blah blah, and then went on a commercial break. My grandma called me in for lunch at that point, and I never got to see how Beakman explained it. And I really ... really wish I had. Even to this day. Even if Beakman just said "You can't control your dreams!" or whatever. I wish I could see the end of that episode. Because, more than ever, would I love to control my dreams ...