April 9th, 2005

handholding

(no subject)

My kitty is dying ;_; I think it has something to do with his teeth. I've been gone for 2 weeks and I just looked at him now and he is VERY very skinny. Looks like he's barely eaten anything. My dad bought him some senior cat food, "For cats ages 7 years and older". Yeah, my cat is almost 16 O_o. I think that's the life expectancy of a cat anyways ... I just don't want to see him die.

I want to take him to a vet to see what's really wrong with him, but I'm afraid to. We haven't exactly been so kind to our house cat. My parents hate cats, they're dog people. And Cinnamon was too old and not really person-trained nor other-cat-trained to come to the apartment. So he's a mess. And I feel bad for him. We got him when I was really young and didn't know what it meant to have a pet. Now that I'm older, I know how to take care of things, but he's too far gone, and my parents are too naive about taking care of a cat. They think because he licks himself, that he's clean. We've never given him a bath, he's never had his back claws clipped, his teeth are yellow and probably very sensative (which leads me to believe that's why he's so skinny).

I want to take him to a vet and claim he's just a stray ... let them take care of him, because I'd much rather him be taken care of and die with people that cared for him than just watch him waste away here in a household that hates cats.

On another note, I emailed the wig chick, and I feel like an ass. I forgot that she mentioned that it would take a little longer for custom colored wigs (I didn't think white was really a 'custom color' but ... )to arrive. She said it would be here on Tuesday.

Ugh, I feel my monthly friend is due to stop by. And it feels like it's gonna be a doozy *sigh*
  • Current Mood
    uncomfortable uncomfortable
handholding

(no subject)

Update on my cat, Cinnamon: He's dying, that's been now confirmed by a vet. We took him just now to an emergency vet a little ways away and they did blood work on him. His liver has failed, he was critically dehydrated, and he had no signs of fat on him anywhere. We decided to leave him at the vet, give him an IV overnight. If his condition doesn't improve on Monday morning, then he'll be put down.

Not a SINGLE ANIMAL that came into that hospital while we were there, left with the people that brought them. All of them had died, or were on their way out and so were put down. Do you know how hard that is to witness while you wait on the fate of your already dying cat? It was hard, it was very hard. It still is. I've had Cinnamon for 16 years now. Almost my entire life. I've never had a pet this close to me be so close to dying. It's really difficult for me to function at all. The whole time I was in the vets office, waiting, if I sat in silence for more than a minute, I began crying. I'm so weak, I hate it. I should've just told my dad to put him down before he began to pay almost $500 to keep him in the hospital overnight ... but I just couldn't talk, I couldn't say what I wanted until we got in the car, until we were away from all those other people that I knew were staring at me.

All I know is, I've said my goodbye to Cinnamon, I don't want to go back there and make a crying fool of myself. I loved him with all of my heart. But it was time for him to go. I wouldn't imagine keeping him alive any longer and live with the pain he has.

Even though you were a stupid, annoying, sometimes pathetic fat cat, I still loved you, I still cared for you. I would always look to your window when I came home to see you perched there, watching me, almost happy to see me (in a kitty sort of staring way). I'll miss nearly stepping on you when I leave the house. I'll miss your pawing at the door for attention. I'll miss talking to you, knowing that you understood me.
  • Current Mood
    sad sad